Every local tournament is an opportunity. When you actively involve yourself and be a part of the community, you can never be certain what you might learn or what you might experience on the night. Take tonight for instance. At tonight’s tournament I spoke with Vash, Zero, Chu, Crimson, and JustGoodPop about my progress and all of them gave me some great advice. I realized a few things.
- Despite my best intentions, despite knowing that I shouldn’t worry about winning, that I should just be focused on learning, I still get wrapped up in winning. And when I don’t, I can’t help but get depressed.
- The more I learn about the game, the more I realize how little I know. I’ve actually said this before, but I’m going to highlight it again because I was reminded tonight that I can’t punish my opponent when I don’t know what can be punished. That’s the truth…and it’s frustrating as hell.
- I’m learning new techniques and trying them in tournament, but I shouldn’t try to be so stylish. I’m going for the really cool/fancy combos but I need to slow down and remember when to use what combos at what percentages. I was reminded that I shouldn’t be trying stuff in tournament if I’m not comfortable with it and can’t hit it consistently in friendlies. There is an issue here of showing off what you know, but they’re right. If I’m not doing it in friendlies why on earth am I trying in tournament?
- Everyone is better than me. I mentioned this before, but I’ll see new people at the locals and I’ll play against them and they’ll beat me. This is an interesting one because you soon find out that either they’re not new, that they just haven’t played for a while or they’ve had a ton of experience in Melee and Brawl and are just now getting competitive. Sure, they may not be able to beat 90% of the locals here, but they can beat me…and it sucks.
- Armchair quarterbacks exist and will bash you every day. I still have people say, I could jump in there and beat those guys. Ummm. No you can’t. Trust me. I’m not getting my ass kicked because I’m bad at video games, I’m getting my ass kicked because Esports are hard and these competitors are tough.
- Confidence is key, but it’s also tricky. If you go into a tournament too confident and lose, you’ll feel like crap. If you go in with no confidence, you’ll play like crap. There is an awareness of skill level but you have to be a little confident to play well. This is something that can’t be taught or felt, but I haven’t been confident since that first tournament back after Genesis and I can see it in my play.
- I am not a snowflake. Everyone feels this way. Everyone went through the same struggle to get where they are today. The question is can I preserver? This is an interesting question. Because this is the point where the game and Esports…especially the FGC separates the wheat from the chaff. When you lose week in and week out for months one end…and not just lose, but pay to lose, you can start to feel like you’re a sadist. You begin to wonder why you are signing up and paying for this abuse. You begin to ask yourself could this time be better spent? I am in it for the long-haul, though. I have to get better. It’s now a personal challenge.
Anyway, on the night I lost to DarkLight someone I really think I should have beat. But I played stupidly and he took advantage. I even SD’d at 0% in my first game. It’s extremely frustrating watching the replay because I see so many opportunities to kill him and so many dumb moves that gave him the chance to kill me. I lost and it was completely my own fault. Next up was Sudowoodo. He destroyed me with Donkey Kong. I was trying to avoid the issue with Chu from last week, but I still go grabbed and I still got Hoo-haa’d. I still overextended my attacks and got grabbed. I still played dumb offstage and I paid for it.
Right now I’m feeling kind of lost. I’m returning home to pick back up with my training and refocus on making these combos muscle memory. I don’t even want to think about it when I play. I want it to be pure reaction.
Thanks for watching.